Psalms 1

It's been awhile since I've done this and I do not feel right about that. It's easy to get out of the habit when the demands of life, work and children are pulling you in a different direction. Although an encounter with a person where I leave feeling hurt can definitely get one back on the wagon again, so to speak.

I read through Psalms 1 this morning after my workout to try and set my mind for the day along with trying to escape the thoughts from last night. I think the verse that stood out to me was "But they delight in doing everything the Lord wants" It's talking through those you abide by God's law versus those you listen to the wicked. One will be set free while the other judge and condemned. Of course I want to delight in everything the Lord wants. I also want to try my best in everything that the Lord wants but really in our world today that is not an easy feat. There are times that I do what I know the Lord will want but it's really hard to "delight" in it. Last night I created, unfortunately my own confrontation. I truly did not mean for it to come off as confrontation but I could tell by the other parties that they definitely took it that way. I knew it right away but instead of trying to resolve it there I walked away. I thought don't add to it. Yet, when I walked in I knew that if I didn't address it that it would be something probably taken out of context and viewed poorly of me. I mustered up the courage to call and apologize. This was not easy at no point in time was I delighted in the conversation. Truthfully there were times that I had tears in my eyes and I wanted to hang up and be over with the conversation. The apology was not what was hard. It was how it was being taken. I knew the person well enough to know that it was going to be taken that way thus not wanting to do so but I moved forward knowing it was what I was supposed to do, what the Lord would have wanted me to do. Apologize, ask for forgiveness. It's in these times that even the right thing to do it's not easy to delight in it.

Lord I ask you for the strength to become a stronger Christian in that I can look at these times in life and truly be delighted in them knowing that by going this path I am becoming a stronger person in your love and in my faith. Lord I pray for help in knowing when to choose the right words in conversations that are hard to truly see it as an apology and that others will view it as sincere and accept it sincerely. The worst to me is an apology that is stated it is accepted when in the heart it is truly not. Help me to grow and become a person that delights in doing everything that you want. Amen.